Monthly Archives: April 2013

The Rebellious Teen | Part 2

2013-04-30T12:53:33+00:00

How To Find Out Why Your Teen Is Angry

There is a secret key to unlocking your teenager and that is relationship.  We, of course, need a balance of relationship and discipline but pursuing relationship is key for the teenage years.  It is easy think, “a teen doesn’t want to spend time with a parent, so by giving them space am I not giving them what they want?” The answer is no.  A teen wants to feel that they are valued, that they belong and that they have a purpose.  Like we said yesterday a teen feels as though they don’t completely fit in society so we need to make sure that they have a secure sense of belonging and purpose with in our family.  Things that we value, we give our time and attention.  During the teenage years we need to make sure that we are taking time to spend quality time with our teen one on one.  This is where a weekly “date” with our child does wonders.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on this topic

The Rebellious Teen | Part 2 2013-04-30T12:53:33+00:00

The Rebellious Teen | Part 1

2013-04-30T12:54:42+00:00

Why It’s Such A Difficult Season

The teenage years can be a difficult season for even the “easiest” of children, but for those who are challenging it can be overwhelming.  We are going to spend the next two weeks looking at teens and rebellion and what we as parents can do about it.  We need to look at why it is such a difficult season for all included.  First, consider that we have reached a point in our culture where teens just don’t fit in anywhere.   They are the in-between.  They are not children but they aren’t considered adults either.  What has changed for teens in the past 100 or so years?  The teens of past generations got married half way through their teenage years.  This means they didn’t have to deal with their budding sexuality.  They also didn’t have to function in an over sexualized culture.  They belonged to something bigger than self, a family unit that probably included lots of extended family.  They knew where they were needed in the family and knew their purpose.  They also spent their teenage years easing into adulthood.   There was a usually some kind of right of passage.  They had a lot less outside influences to filter through.  If we look at it in this way it shows a pretty serious cultural shift from past generations.

Check back for more on teens and rebellion over the next two weeks.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on this topic.

The Rebellious Teen | Part 1 2013-04-30T12:54:42+00:00

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 5

2013-04-22T23:09:18+00:00

Remembering My Child is Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

We are privileged to have a special guest with us this week to discuss this important topic.

Monika Schuelke, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who completed her undergraduate degree at Northwestern University and her graduate degrees at Nova Southeastern University.  Since 2007, she has been working for Child Provider Specialists, where she specializes in diagnostics.  She has extensive experience assessing children and adolescents with cognitive and/or learning challenges, as well as social, emotional, and/or behavioral difficulties.  Additionally, she spent 10 years in the field of Christian education and frequently uses her experiences in the classroom when working with educators to help meet the needs of children.  

Be sure to listen to today’s podcast for her expertise on this topic.

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 5 2013-04-22T23:09:18+00:00

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 4

2013-04-22T23:07:19+00:00

The Evaluation Process- Part #2

We are privileged to have a special guest with us this week to discuss this important topic.

Monika Schuelke, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who completed her undergraduate degree at Northwestern University and her graduate degrees at Nova Southeastern University.  Since 2007, she has been working for Child Provider Specialists, where she specializes in diagnostics.  She has extensive experience assessing children and adolescents with cognitive and/or learning challenges, as well as social, emotional, and/or behavioral difficulties.  Additionally, she spent 10 years in the field of Christian education and frequently uses her experiences in the classroom when working with educators to help meet the needs of children.  

Be sure to listen to today’s podcast for her expertise on this topic.

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 4 2013-04-22T23:07:19+00:00

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 3

2013-04-22T23:05:16+00:00

The Evaluation Process- Part #1

We are privileged to have a special guest with us this week to discuss this important topic.

Monika Schuelke, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who completed her undergraduate degree at Northwestern University and her graduate degrees at Nova Southeastern University.  Since 2007, she has been working for Child Provider Specialists, where she specializes in diagnostics.  She has extensive experience assessing children and adolescents with cognitive and/or learning challenges, as well as social, emotional, and/or behavioral difficulties.  Additionally, she spent 10 years in the field of Christian education and frequently uses her experiences in the classroom when working with educators to help meet the needs of children.  

Be sure to listen to today’s podcast for her expertise on this topic.

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 3 2013-04-22T23:05:16+00:00

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 2

2013-04-22T23:03:04+00:00

I Think My Child Has ADHD

We are privileged to have a special guest with us this week to discuss this important topic.

Monika Schuelke, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who completed her undergraduate degree at Northwestern University and her graduate degrees at Nova Southeastern University.  Since 2007, she has been working for Child Provider Specialists, where she specializes in diagnostics.  She has extensive experience assessing children and adolescents with cognitive and/or learning challenges, as well as social, emotional, and/or behavioral difficulties.  Additionally, she spent 10 years in the field of Christian education and frequently uses her experiences in the classroom when working with educators to help meet the needs of children.  

Be sure to listen to today’s podcast for her expertise on this topic.

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 2 2013-04-22T23:03:04+00:00

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 1

2013-04-22T22:59:38+00:00

My Child Is Smart. So Why Is He Struggling In School?

We are privileged to have a special guest with us this week to discuss this important topic.

Monika Schuelke, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who completed her undergraduate degree at Northwestern University and her graduate degrees at Nova Southeastern University.  Since 2007, she has been working for Child Provider Specialists, where she specializes in diagnostics.  She has extensive experience assessing children and adolescents with cognitive and/or learning challenges, as well as social, emotional, and/or behavioral difficulties.  Additionally, she spent 10 years in the field of Christian education and frequently uses her experiences in the classroom when working with educators to help meet the needs of children.  

Be sure to listen to today’s podcast for her expertise on this topic.

Understanding My Child’s Lack of Performance w/Dr. Monika Schuelke | Part 1 2013-04-22T22:59:38+00:00

Signal Behavior | Part 5

2013-04-19T20:03:14+00:00

Remember This Is A Long Term Project

We spoke yesterday about continuing the training into the teen years.  This is one of those areas in parenting that is a long term project.  This training is a marathon not a sprint.  We can’t give up when it feels like the communication training we worked hard on in the early childhood years seems like it is needed again, and more than ever in the teen years.  Some of the behaviors may even look the same as many parents of teens can attest as they watch a teenage temper tantrum. We just have to keep at the communication training and not reinforcing the negative behavior.  Many adults around us have not been trained to communicate and can be seen acting out as a result of pain.  Those people are very hard to be married to and difficult to employ.  This is why we must focus on the day to day process of training in communication and remember it is worth running this marathon for our child’s future!

Isaiah 40:31 “But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.”

2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful.”

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on this topic.

Signal Behavior | Part 5 2013-04-19T20:03:14+00:00

Signal Behavior | Part 4

2013-04-18T20:01:27+00:00

Continuing Communication Training In The Teen Years

We’ve spent a lot of this week talking about signal behavior with younger children.  Acting out with temper tantrums and other negative behavior.  But what about when it happens in older children and teens?  This age also acts out when they are hurting but there are other things that happen as well.

There was a few ways to tell when one of our residential girls was in pain and didn’t know how to express it.  She would be mean to the other girls in the house, she would become sullen, or she would pull away and withdraw.  I had to train these girls that I was a safe place to come in and talk when they were hurting, so I had to read the signs and begin the process of helping them communicate through it.

I found that when a girl was really struggling to communicate finding a neutral turf was the best to get them to talk.  Either taking them out to lunch or even just talking when we were doing another activity, like playing basketball or painting nails depending on the girl.   Don’t allow your child to withdraw and more importantly don’t take it personally. Pursue your child and continue the communication training!

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on this topic.

Signal Behavior | Part 4 2013-04-18T20:01:27+00:00

Signal Behavior | Part 3

2013-04-17T20:00:29+00:00

Developing Healthy Communication Skills

Developing healthy communication skills is one of the most important areas of Parenting.  If someone can’t communicate what’s going on inside them they will find marriage very difficult. They will hide in a shell, medicate or explode.  As a parent we need to find the line of dealing with the behavior but making sure we are also training our child to communicate what is wrong.  We also cannot let them get what they want by means of negative behavior.

Currently, as I am writing this my three year old has started struggling with bedtime again. He has been getting out of his bed because he knows that mommy or daddy will have to come in to discipline.  He is seeking relationship and is communicating through his behavior that he needs one of us to be with him. This behavior has started again because he is working through being an older brother and having to share mommy’s attention with his two-month-old baby brother.  He doesn’t know how to verbalize these feelings, and may not completely understand that he is having them, so he is reaching out for relationship with his negative behavior.  We have to be very careful not to reinforce him getting up.  So we wait for a time where he is laying in his bed, doing what he is suppose to, at that point we can go back in to lie down with him to talk and reinforce how important he is to us.  Make sure that you are reading the signal behavior and not reinforcing negative behavior but teaching your child to communicate using it.

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on this topic.

Signal Behavior | Part 3 2013-04-17T20:00:29+00:00