Making Your Marriage the Key Relationship in the Family | Part 3

Making Your Marriage the Key Relationship in the Family | Part 3

Jul 31

How Did So Many Homes Go From Marriage-Centered to Child-Centered

One answer may be that many homes were not honestly marriage-centered.  Becoming one flesh and actually “doing” marriage is a difficult task.  Many couples, when they leave the honeymoon phase of their marriage relationship, begin to focus on their careers as a priority.  We can easily divvy up jobs and tasks and almost become strangers sleeping next to each other.   It is also easy to forget to continually pursue our spouse, to continue to deepen the friendship and intimacy.  If kids enter at this point it is easy to see how their needs become front and center and the marriage needs get placed on the back burner.

Even the strongest marriages will have to continually battle the tyranny of the urgent and fight to be consumed by the needs of children or paying the bills.  Children are an amazing blessing from God but a couple needs to remember that child rearing is just a season of their marriage.  A marriage that is going to last a lifetime needs time and input, even through those frenetic years of parenting.

Make the choice today to keep your marriage a priority.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 

 
Making Your Marriage the Key Relationship in the Family | Part 2

Making Your Marriage the Key Relationship in the Family | Part 2

Jul 30

It’s The Training Ground For The Marriages of Your Children

For better or worse our marriage sets up our children’s expectations for their marriages. This is another important reason to make sure that the marriage relationship is the priority relationship in the home, after a relationship with God. Here are some areas to process through and make sure that your children are seeing Godly examples in, Biblical leadership and Biblical submission.  Do you and your spouse edify each other or tear each other down in front of your children? Do your children observe healthy conflict? Do your children see you having fun together? Can they see that you are still attracted to each other?  Do they see mommy and daddy go on dates and other things that would suggest that the relationship is a priority?

We have discussed some of the ways our marriages impact our children in our series Role Modeling Commitment In Your Marriage.  Click here to check out that series.

 

For more insight on this topic listen to today’s podcast.

 

 
Making Your Marriage the Key Relationship in the Family | Part 1

Making Your Marriage the Key Relationship in the Family | Part 1

Jul 29

Why It Is The Most Important

It is so easy to allow your marriage to fall on the back burner when you have children.  Why does this happen? There are a few reasons, first may be that the couple placed a higher priority on their careers so it was easy for children to fill that spot.  Secondly, life happens so fast and marriage takes time and effort.  So maybe the concept of the tyranny of the urgent takes over and we know that parenting needs to be a priority so we devote all of our time and energy to that.

It is so worth the time and work to maintain your marriage.   It’s God’s plan: Genesis 2:24-25 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. “ The primary relationship for the spouses, other than God, is the marriage relationship.  It is a launch pad for the next generation.  God created the family structure with the marriage as the foundation, a husband and a wife, two very different people becoming one – like concrete and steel – forming the inseparable foundation for the family to be built on. That’s why God hates divorce (Malachi) It is a representation of His love relationship with the church.  We have the privilege to live out God’s love for our children.  That is why it is worth putting in the time and effort to make it a priority.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 
Becoming A Better Parent with Guest: Adam Roberts | Part 5

Becoming A Better Parent with Guest: Adam Roberts | Part 5

Jul 26

The Key that Makes the Plan Work

Being a consistent parent is that key. Once the schedule is set, the rules have been posted,the consequences and rewards are decided and communicated, begin to utilize the plan. You will have to do the plan over and over, because children will test it, over and over. Be prepared for a Marathon not a Sprint! Our children need to see that every time they choose to break a rule they will receive the appropriate predetermined consequence or reward. Remember, don’t give up when it seems like the plan is not working! Don’t give up when it seems like your child doesn’t care! Don’t give up because you get very tired! Remember you are not their friend first, you are their parent. This can seem like a daunting task, but for a parent who tends to be overactive, the plan is freedom because we know that now there is fence and we can hold them accountable in their bounderies. We can back up and take off the leash. For the parent that tends to be in active, the plan is freedom because we don’t have to wonder what we are going to do the next time a behavior issue catches us off guard. The plan has helped to keep us involved, aware and a part of their lives. We can put up the fence knowing we are not being mean by setting up boundaries, we are helping them learn to make wise choices. Remember we are not raising a perfect child, we are raising a capable adult.

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 
Becoming A Better Parent with Guest: Adam Roberts | Part 4

Becoming A Better Parent with Guest: Adam Roberts | Part 4

Jul 25

Be An Informed Parent

In order to come up with appropriate rewards and consequences for your child, you have to know what makes them tick. For example, if your child is not that into video games the idea of loosing the Xbox for a week may not be an effective consequence. But more then that we need to study out children to simply know what makes them tick. If you know what your teen is into it may be easier to get them excited about spending time with you. With that being said we also need to keep in mind that there is probably a twenty year or more age gap between us and our teens. Things are very different for this generation. They deal with more than any other generation before in regards to stress, peer pressure and moral struggles. It is even more imperative for that reason for this generation of parents to know what our children are into. Take the time to become a student of your child. It will be well worth the time and effort.

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on this topic.