The Importance of Teaching Your Child to Communicate | Part 2

The Importance of Teaching Your Child to Communicate | Part 2

Sep 30

Helping My Child Share Feelings In A Positive Way

One of the most important aspects of communication is the ability to share ones feelings. Although this seems such a basic form of communication it can be easily overlooked in the training of our children. Yesterday we talked about how our current culture is so distracted and fast paced that we cannot take our job of training our children to communicate for granted.  It must be something that is done very intentionally.

When children are younger we are constantly reminding them to, “Use your Words”, in order to help them communicate. As they grow older we may allow them to try and communicate through emotions,  such as anger or frustration, because we have grown weary of the time it takes to deal with their behavior .  However, when our children are acting out in frustration or anger, we need to remind them to use their words.  If our children are not trained how to communicate their feelings both positive and negative, it can lead to some destructive behavior patterns.  Bottling up emotions can be very dangerous.  When you are teaching your child how to communicate their feelings, you are also beginning to help them learn how to process through their emotions.  Emotions that are raw and un-processed can also lead to destructive behaviors.   We must be constantly in tune with our children’s day to day so that we can remind them to “use their words. “

 
The Importance of Teaching Your Child to Communicate | Part 1

The Importance of Teaching Your Child to Communicate | Part 1

Sep 29

Why Is This So Important?

For the next two weeks, we will be talking about training your kids to communicate.  This is one of those valuable tools that will help your kids be marriageable and employable in the future.

There are many adults today that have not been trained how to communicate.  Because of  the distractions of today’s culture this is something that we have to make a priority for the family.  In the past families did things together for entertainment so communication was more natural.  With the introduction of the three “T’s” (television, transportation, technology) the natural family communication state has been interrupted. With television, the entertainment was moved from internal, or within the family, to external.  This and other technological advances have made it that we must be intentional in training our children to communicate.

 
My Child Seems So Angry | Part 5

My Child Seems So Angry | Part 5

Sep 26

It’s Never Too Late

There are some children who because of temperament or strong will seem to deal with anger issues more.  If you step back as a parent and feel as though all of your children are “barbarians” or strong willed, it may be a flawed system.  A lack of boundaries or structure can cause anger in children.  Children seem to have radar for inconsistency and know when their parents are not being consistent.  If there is not a plan in place then it is easy for us to shoot from the hip with consequences and be inconsistent.  This means that the consequence may be different each time, or with each child, for the same offence.  This can cause anger issues.

If we think about it, we seem to get angry at the police officer who pulls us over, as if he has done something wrong.  But the system, although these men and women deserve our respect for daily putting their lives on the line, is flawed.  There is no way a police officer can pull us over every time we go a mile over the speed limit, there is just not that much man power.  So it creates anger because of the inconsistency.  We place the blame on the officer, who is merely doing their job, instead of on the person who is really at fault, ourselves.  It is the same in parenting if our plan is inconsistent.  But the good news is it is never too late.  If you are seeing warning signs of this in your home take some time even this weekend to evaluate your plan.  See if there need to be changes made to make it more consistent!

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on anger in children.

 
My Child Seems So Angry | Part 4

My Child Seems So Angry | Part 4

Sep 25

The Long-Term Implications Of My Child’s Anger

It often seems easier for parents to look the other way during certain behaviors a child displays.  Parents that do this may believe that over time this behavior will just disappear or correct itself.  Unfortunately most times this is not the case.  The Bible does not tell us, to wait through behaviors, it says to “Train up a child.” Training requires action.

Anger issues are something that we as parents need to jump on because they do have serious long term implications.  Unfortunately, if a parent does not help their child learn impulse control then a first boss or spouse may have to.  Learning how to deal with anger and not bottle it or allow it to develop into rage is something that will help our child be marriageable and employable.

Take the time to work through the temper tantrums or train your older child how to talk through their emotions.  Learning impulse and self- control has far reaching implications and is well worth the training time.

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on anger in children.

 
My Child Seems So Angry | Part 3

My Child Seems So Angry | Part 3

Sep 24

Training Kids To Talk So They Don’t Explode

It is interesting to watch a toddler, who is just learning to talk, get frustrated.  It is almost like they have forgotten their newly found skill.  Often times a parent that calmly and gently reminds their emoting child to, “use your words”, will avoid a temper tantrum.  For toddlers simply verbally expressing their need or frustration may help to defuse them.  This is actually the same for all of us.

Learning to properly vent emotions is something that we need to train our children how to do.  This is where we need to watch for their “signal behavior”, anger may come out differently for each child, often personality and age play a part.  Some are prone to outbursts while others clam up and get sullen.  After you have learned what your child’s signal behavior is pursue a time to talk.  For some children simply sitting by their bed will work, others may need a more neutral environment and some children even need a distraction to do with their hands in order to open up.   This is where we must become a student of our children learning how they best communicate.  Learning how to verbalize anger and frustration in a mature way is something that is key for a successful marriage.  That is why priority should be placed on teaching our children to communicate at this level.   The upside is that it will eventually save our kids and us a lot of frustration!

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on anger in children.