Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 4

Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 4

Mar 31

Setting The Example

To the responsible adult delayed gratification may be something that is not processed, but lived out even in small decisions. We don’t eat certain things, buy certain things, or do certain things for the purpose of bettering our future.  Process through some of your decisions, that set the example in delayed gratification, with your children especially as they get older.  Look for opportunities to include them in the process, explain why you choose not to eat out as much for example, or buy a new car as often. You can even include them in long-term projects so they can enjoy the reward of “plugging away” at something until the job is done.  This lesson can even give children the strength to cope with difficult situations in adulthood, for instance a hard season in a future marriage.  The reward is great when you have learned to slowly work on something to fix a problem, rather then simply throwing away and looking for something new.  Learning the lesson of delayed gratification may mean the difference between failure and success for your child.  Look for ways to set the example in your own life.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 
Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 3

Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 3

Mar 30

Teaching Disciplines They’ll Need As Adults

There are several disciplines that our children will need to know for adulthood and these are all disciplines that involve delayed gratification.  The first is teaching chores. Having a child do chores helps to teach that they are a member of a family unit.  This may mean putting aside what they want to do for a while in order to contribute to the family. Click here for more from the weeklong series on chores. Second is education. Learning how to study is definitely a discipline in delayed gratification. This is imperative for a college student who must learn how to balance the social scene, sometimes a job, and their studies. This leads us to the third discipline, which is time management.  Maturity is learning to balance time well, sometimes choosing to do what I need to do over what I want to do.  Click here for our week long series on time management.  Teaching sexual purity isn’t a discipline that ends with marriage.  In order to stay faithful to a spouse our teens must be trained to handle the delayed gratification of sexual purity.  Click here for more on teaching purity to your children. Finally teaching your child how to handle their finances is a very important lesson in delayed gratification.  Teaching a child how to pass up spending on small items in order to save for a future big item is a great and valuable lesson.  Click here for more on teaching finances.  There are many areas that are critical for success as an adult, take the time to make sure your child is prepared by teaching delayed gratification.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 

 
Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 2

Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 2

Mar 29

Where To Begin Teaching This

Once the decision has been made that this is an important area to add to the training process, where do we go next? One thing that needs to be looked at is where the child is at developmentally.  For young children this is an especially hard area because of their immaturity and short attention span.  So we must adjust our expectation to realistically train where they are.  For example, it is unrealistic to expect a toddler to sit and build an entire city with blocks. Anyone who has had a toddler knows that the favorite game with blocks is to knock them over.  So a very easy beginning lesson in delayed gratification is having them help build the tower, teaching them to wait until the end to knock it over.  Teaching delayed gratification using play is a great place to start.  We can utilize things like puzzles and games to teach this.  As the child ages we can slowly raise the expectation level, simple things like teaching a child not to interrupt others is a lesson in delayed gratification.  Take the time to look around for age appropriate lessons in delayed gratification. This can simply be utilizing things you do with your child already, just more intentionally.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 
Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 1

Taking Them From Instant Gratification to Delayed Gratification | Part 1

Mar 28

Why Is This Important?

The “instant pleasures” of life can have the potential to rob us of the “greater treasures” of life.  Learning delayed gratification helps a person invest now for their future.  It also helps teach how to make better decisions about the here and now, that I will be grateful for later on.  Learning the self-discipline of delayed gratification impacts, a teens ability to stay sexually pure until marriage, learning how to save money for the future, teaches a student to study now to reap the benefits later, and to plan ahead rather than live for the moment.

This is difficult because it doesn’t come naturally to us.  There is nothing in the current culture around us that teaches this discipline. We are a culture of instant gratification.  We don’t want to wait and feel that we shouldn’t have to wait.  Cultures past had consistent lessons in delayed gratification because they had to wait for everything from the growing of the crops for food, to the sun rising for light to begin their day.  Today’s parent has to be intentional to look for lessons in delayed gratification in order to teach this discipline to their children.  Check back the rest of this week as we look at how to teach this.

 

As always listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

 
What To Do With Easter | Part 5

What To Do With Easter | Part 5

Mar 25

A Story For Easter

There is a beautiful story that you can read to your children Easter morning. It is a story that has to do with the linen cloth placed over Jesus face during his burial.  Here it is.

The Folded Napkin (author anonymous)

The Gospel of John (20:7) tells us that the napkin, which was placed over the face of Jesus, was not just thrown aside like the grave clothes.

The Bible takes an entire verse to tell us that the napkin was neatly folded, and was placed at the head of that stony coffin.

Early Sunday morning, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb and found that the stone had been rolled away from the entrance.

She ran and found Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved.. She said, ‘They have taken the Lord’s body out of the tomb, and I don’t know where they have put him!’

Peter and the other disciple ran to the tomb to see. The other disciple out ran Peter and got there first. He stopped and looked in and saw the linen cloth lying there, but he didn’t go in.

Then Simon Peter arrived and went inside. He also noticed the linen wrappings lying there, while the cloth that had covered Jesus’ head was folded up and lying to the side.

Was that important? Absolutely!

Is it really significant? Yes!

In order to understand the significance of the folded napkin, you have to understand a little bit about Hebrew tradition of that day.   The folded napkin had to do with the Master and Servant, and every Jewish boy knew this tradition.

When the servant set the dinner table for the master, he made sure that it was exactly the way the master wanted it.   The table was furnished perfectly, and then the servant would wait, just out of sight, until the master had finished eating, and the servant would not dare touch that table, until the master was finished.

Now if the master were done eating, he would rise from the table, wipe his fingers, his mouth, and clean his beard, and would wad up that napkin and toss it onto the table.    The servant would then know to clear the table. For in those days, the wadded napkin meant,  “I’m finished.”

But if the master got up from the table, and folded his napkin, and laid it beside his plate, the servant would not dare touch the table, because……….

The folded napkin meant,

“I’m coming back”

 

author- unknown

Listen to today’s podcast for more on celebrating Easter as a Family.