Monthly Archives: May 2016

Being Married with Kids | Part 5

2016-05-20T21:00:25+00:00

His Needs vs. Her Needs

First, we need to remember that males and females need different things not only from a relationship but they also differ in how they react to a situation.  Females stereotypically will react from an emotional side and males will usually try to take on the same issue from a pragmatic or practical view.  It is amazing how God made us to compliment each other but if we go into dealing with an issue thinking that we will handle issues the same way we are in for failure.  If we recognize that we are different, instead of getting frustrated with the others reaction, we can utilize these differences to balance each other out and come to a great compromise.  This is especially useful for parenting because we can come to the middle on a decision instead of erring to the too soft or too harsh side.  We also have to keep in mind that it is not necessarily that one parent cares more or less about the situation it is that we go into it with very different viewpoints.

The other area where are needs are very different as genders, stereotypically, is what we need from each other at the end of the day.  A mom will probably need her husband to interact with her emotionally and relationally and the husband may have “used all his words for the day” and be ready to zone.  Make sure that you are taking the time to communicate to each other what your needs are so that you can be on the same page, instead of getting frustrated or irritated with each other.  Choosing to be intentional with your relationship will help you to grow closer as friends, this will allow for growth in your marriage even when the days get long.

Choose to be MARRIED with children!

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

Being Married with Kids | Part 5 2016-05-20T21:00:25+00:00

Being Married with Kids | Part 5

2016-05-16T12:08:12+00:00

His Needs vs. Her Needs

First, we need to remember that males and females need different things not only from a relationship but they also differ in how they react to a situation.  Females stereotypically will react from an emotional side and males will usually try to take on the same issue from a pragmatic or practical view.  It is amazing how God made us to compliment each other but if we go into dealing with an issue thinking that we will handle issues the same way we are in for failure.  If we recognize that we are different, instead of getting frustrated with the others reaction, we can utilize these differences to balance each other out and come to a great compromise.  This is especially useful for parenting because we can come to the middle on a decision instead of erring to the too soft or too harsh side.  We also have to keep in mind that it is not necessarily that one parent cares more or less about the situation it is that we go into it with very different viewpoints.

The other area where are needs are very different as genders, stereotypically, is what we need from each other at the end of the day.  A mom will probably need her husband to interact with her emotionally and relationally and the husband may have “used all his words for the day” and be ready to zone.  Make sure that you are taking the time to communicate to each other what your needs are so that you can be on the same page, instead of getting frustrated or irritated with each other.  Choosing to be intentional with your relationship will help you to grow closer as friends, this will allow for growth in your marriage even when the days get long.

Choose to be MARRIED with children!

Listen to today’s podcast for more on this topic.

Being Married with Kids | Part 5 2016-05-16T12:08:12+00:00

Being Married with Kids | Part 4

2016-05-19T21:00:24+00:00

Being On The Same Team

One of the things that is imperative for parents is to be on the same page in parenting. Children can easily sense that parents are not on the same team and exploit the situation. But even worse can frustrate the two spouses and eventually drive a wedge between them.

Creating a parenting plan is the way to keep two spouses on the same page. The next step is to have a weekly “staff meeting” to allow you to keep up with the plan and any adjustments that will happen.  You also need to communicate to your children that you are a united front. Saying things like, “ your father/mother and I need to talk about this so I will let you know our decision,” when your children come to you asking to do something out of the ordinary or if there is a big rule infraction.

Remember that everyone will come to parenting with different expectations. You have to take the time to work as a team in order to be consistent in how you handle things.  If you don’t take the time to be on the same page when situations arise, resentment can build that can tear apart the marriage relationship. Make those weekly staff meetings a priority on your calendar!

 

For more on this topic listen to today’s podcast

 

Being Married with Kids | Part 4 2016-05-19T21:00:24+00:00

Being Married with Kids | Part 4

2016-05-16T12:08:33+00:00

Being On The Same Team

One of the things that is imperative for parents is to be on the same page in parenting. Children can easily sense that parents are not on the same team and exploit the situation. But even worse can frustrate the two spouses and eventually drive a wedge between them.

Creating a parenting plan is the way to keep two spouses on the same page. The next step is to have a weekly “staff meeting” to allow you to keep up with the plan and any adjustments that will happen.  You also need to communicate to your children that you are a united front. Saying things like, “ your father/mother and I need to talk about this so I will let you know our decision,” when your children come to you asking to do something out of the ordinary or if there is a big rule infraction.

Remember that everyone will come to parenting with different expectations. You have to take the time to work as a team in order to be consistent in how you handle things.  If you don’t take the time to be on the same page when situations arise, resentment can build that can tear apart the marriage relationship. Make those weekly staff meetings a priority on your calendar!

 

For more on this topic listen to today’s podcast

 

Being Married with Kids | Part 4 2016-05-16T12:08:33+00:00