As your children grow and are building trust to the level that they can begin to do things outside the home there are four questions that need to be answered. “You need to be able to answer these four questions before you can get our permission to go anywhere.” Secondarily, “if at any time the answer to any of these questions changes call me.”
The Obvious questions are, Who, What, When and Where. Who are you going with or who is going to be there? What will you be doing? When will you be home? Where will you be?
Helping children create a plan for what they will be doing in the long run helps them avoid temptation … if they will stick to the plan. This also gives them an out if things begin to change. It is also the parent’s job to hold them accountable to these questions. This is where the checking up on them that we discussed last month will come into play. Even though they may not understand it at the time, you are communicating that you care enough about them to make sure they are doing what they say!