Facing the Challenges of Blending Families
In any difficult circumstance one thing that needs to be avoided is a victim mentality. It is so easy to get sucked into the poor me attitude and begin to be depressed. First it needs to be said, that we in no way mean to down play the pain that comes with some of the circumstances in a blending family. However, it is easy to get stuck in the trap of this attitude and not be able to move forward.
One thing to consider through difficult circumstances is that your Father knows about it. It’s a comfort to know that He not only knows our circumstances but also has felt the same pain. When there is a rough day choose to focus on Him.
Philippians 4:6-8 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.”
A practical way to avoid the victim mentality is to adjust your expectations. There is no such thing as a perfect family; every family has its mess. If we adjust our expectations it helps us to not be disappointed by circumstances. The reality is, that there may be tension with the “Ex.” We also need to remember that children are children and they do not handle things the way adults should. So many times we place unrealistic expectations on our children and are hurt when they don’t come to fruition. It is especially important to give children of blending families room for adjustment and even allow them to grieve. We cannot take the behavior personally.
On difficult days remind yourself, “My Father knows about this!”
Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on blending families.