Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 5

Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 5

Sep 25

Helping Your Child Deal With Peer Pressure

Finally this week here are some verses that will help us when we face peer pressure as adult and as we train our children to make the right decision when facing negative pressure.

Romans 12:1&2 states, “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.  Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

2 Timothy 1:7 states, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”

Joshua 1:9 states, “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Another great study is the life of Joseph.  Which can be found beginning in Genesis 37.  One of the main points to note is Genesis 39:6-10, Joseph stood up in the face of temptation.  His reason for the decision that he made was that he did not want to “sin against God.”  This was such an unpopular decision that it landed him in jail.  But it is such a great story to show that even if there are trials for making the unpopular decision God still has a plan for our life.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on the topic of peer pressure.

 
Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 4

Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 4

Sep 24

Practicing Supervised Peer Pressure

There are several ways we can prepare our child for the battle of peer pressure.  The first is, as always, leading by example.  Do you set the example in front of your children of not conforming to peer pressure?  As your children get older process with and include them in some of your decision making.  Discuss with them why when everyone else is doing/buying this we as a family have make the decision to not.  Be the example in a culture that is self-absorbed, give to others and allow your children to observe and be a part.

Give them opportunities to practice making decisions about peer pressure even when they are young.  If they want something that costs more then you had planned to spend, whether it be something for school or gift for a birthday, because it is the more popular choice, allow them to contribute their money towards the purchase.  By doing this you allow them to feel that giving into peer pressure “cost” them something.

Keep in mind that family relationships are not a substitute for learning to deal with peer pressure because these are decisions that will have to be made most often when family is not physically there, such as on a college/high school campus or on a date.  Strong family relationships are however, the platform of strength, from which a child can feel confident when responding to negative peer pressure.  They will always know that there is someone who loves them and who is behind them cheering when the make the right choice even if it is unpopular.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on the topic of peer pressure.

 
Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 3

Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 3

Sep 23

What Part Does A Parent Play in Peer Pressure

First we need to ask ourselves two questions.  Do we feel that peer pressure can have a negative impact on our children? Do we feel that peer pressure can have a negative impact on adult?  From what we have already discussed the answer should be a resounding yes! If children are not taught how to deal with peer pressure they not only can make decisions as teens that can affect the rest of their lives but they can make decisions as adults that can have just as severe of consequences.

Thankfully most teens when polled will still state that their parents are their number one influence.  It is our job to keep it that way.  Family cannot become little more then a “layover” before the next activity.  As we have discussed countless times management of our schedules is imperative so that family relationships can be maintained and deepened. Family must be the soil of relationship that the child is safe to grow in.  It must be a place of unconditional love, non-performance oriented love.

Without these family relationships, or if we become so busy that we neglect these relationships, children will look for a place to find acceptance.  That can be peers, social media, online gaming, or boy/girl friends.  Ask yourself who you want to be your child’s number one influence?

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on the topic of peer pressure.

 
Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 2

Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 2

Sep 22

Factors That Play A Part In Peer Pressure

To understand the factors in peer pressure we also need to see when it begins. Peer pressure actually begins as soon as a child begins interacting and observing other people.  It is amazing you can watch toddlers pick up behaviors from other toddlers such as taking a toy away from another child and saying mine, that is under the assumption that they are not observing this behavior in their parents.  Parents and other adults also have a huge influence on their children.  Small children are constantly observing learning and mimicking their parents and other adults.   So in a way this is “pressure” to “conform” to certain behaviors or mimicking because the behaviors are thought to be normal.

What factors affect a teens ability to resist temptation? A strong sense of self is the first.  Are they secure in who they are where another’s opinion will not cause them to cave into doing something they know/feel is wrong.  The second is a strong sense of family.  The support of family can be an amazing factor, a desire to not let other family members down. Also the knowledge that there will be support at home when I make the right decision even if it is unpopular.  Thirdly, faith can play a huge role.  When a child is grounded in what the Bible says not only as a list of rules but that those rules are there to protect their relationship with God and others it can have a major impact.  From this faith will be a knowledge that God has a plan for their life which can give the strength to say no to temptation. (Jeremiah 29:11)

Finally helping your child find a peer group that will share the same beliefs and values will help your child by exerting positive peer pressure.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on the topic of peer pressure.

 

 

Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 1

Preparing Your Child for Peer Pressure | Part 1

Sep 21

What Is Peer Pressure?

In its most basic form peer pressure is the push to conform to those in a group in which you belong or want to belong.  It can be pressure to change your beliefs, values, behaviors, attitudes or appearance. We find this in all walks of life but it would seem because our children/teens are still searching to define who they are we can see the most extreme forms of peer pressure in the teen culture.  The desire to belong or fit in a group has caused some teens to do some unbelievable things, from totally changing their outward appearance to the unthinkable.

Some parents are left scratching their head wondering what happened? The topic this week will help to arm parents in preparing their children to be strong in the face of peer pressure.  Not only in resisting temptation but resisting the pressure to do things that may have life long consequences simply to fit in.

Lastly, I would like to leave you with an illustration that I used countless times with the girls in the residential program to show how imperative it is to arm our kids to deal with these pressures. I would have one girl stand on a chair and have another face her and hold her hands.  The girl standing up on the chair would be instructed to pull the other girl up onto the chair with her.  This would be very difficult if not impossible.  However, it would be very easy for the girl in the lower position to pull the first girl off the chair.  This is how peer pressure is, unless we are taking the time to prepare our kids.  It will be very easy for a group of kids to “pull them down” off their foundation unless we are taking the time make sure our children are rooted strongly.

 

Listen to today’s podcast for more insight on the topic of peer pressure.