quality time

Family Fun | Part 5


Perfection vs. Fun

There is such pressure for performance and perfection in today’s culture, from how we perform at work/school to our appearance.  A great way to defuse this pressure is family fun.  Especially fun at a parent’s expense, this helps model for a child how not to take themselves to seriously.   In our house this was Dad.  Dad made sure that he rigged it so that he lost most of the games we played.  He then would make a huge show of loosing meaning that he would burst into tears or being silly throw a temper tantrum.  There were many creative ways to have us all hysterically laughing.  It seems he took it as a challenge if one of us was in a bad mood to do something ridiculous to make us laugh.  There was even several times that he “fell asleep” at the breakfast table and got oatmeal all over his face.  This was a great lesson for us in how its ok to be silly and to laugh at yourself.


Family Fun | Part 52018-06-22T08:27:33-04:00

Family Fun | Part 4


The Value of Food Coloring

With the explosion of social media there is an overwhelming amount of information on how to have fun and create fun family memories. From blogs, like this one, to pinterest we have no excuse to not have creative family time.  We just have to make the time.

There are two types of fun that need to take place because they serve two different purposes.  The first is spontaneous fun, this is the type of fun that breaks routine. We gave an example of this unexpected fun with the story of the water balloons earlier this week.  It can even be something like having a themed dinner, picnic on the floor, dinner at the beach or the park on a weeknight, or even as simple as stopping for an ice-cream off the dollar menu to celebrate a Tuesday.

The other type of fun is scheduled fun.  This is setting aside time to have fun together as a family.  A great example of this is a family game night.  Family game night can do a lot more then just fun. It can help to teach a child how to have fun with competition and how to win/loose appropriately.

Make it a habit to have moments of spontaneous and scheduled fun at least once a week.



Family Fun | Part 42018-06-22T08:26:45-04:00

Family Fun | Part 3


It Doesn’t Have to Cost Money

Today’s society has such a warped view of what fun is.  For many of us fun is wrapped around getting something new or paying someone/something to entertain us.  Many of us pay to take our children places for them to be entertained.  We need to teach our children what it means to have fun with out spending.  This doesn’t mean sitting your children down and lecturing them how when you were a child you could spend the day entertaining yourself out side with only a stick or a rock.  This means setting the example.  Play with your children, don’t just set them in front of the TV or videogame as a babysitter.

Another thing that we can do is encourage our children to develop their imagination.  Spend time reading to your children or making time for them to read.  Loose your inhibitions and spend time in the back yard pretending to fight the dragon or sailing across the ocean with your young children.  Take the time to kick/throw/ hit a ball with your older children.  Show them that fun doesn’t have to cost anything. There is also something to be said for the value of knowing how to entertain yourself and not have to be entertained.




Family Fun | Part 32018-06-22T08:25:39-04:00

Family Fun | Part 2


It Relieves Stress

We touched on the concept of fun as a stress relieve a little bit yesterday.  It is amazing that fun can be like a mini vacation from life. It is amazing how just a few brief moments of fun can lighten the load of a stressful situation.  It also helps us as parents keep proper perspective on what truly is important.

For example, during a particularly stressful time for the girls in the residential program, meaning they were having a bad week of fighting between each other, the house mom and I decided that we needed to create a “distraction of fun”.  When the house pop left in the van to pick up the girls we spent 30 minutes filling water balloons.  Now was there other things that we could have, and probably should have, been doing with that time? Yes, but we knew that it would help the girls relationally if we could create a distraction.  We were around the corner of the house when the van pulled in and soaked them as they got out.  It is amazing what being pelted with water balloons does to build camaraderie in a group.  We were able to defuse the tension and relational stress with fun.

Try finding time for some silly fun in your house this week.



Family Fun | Part 22018-06-22T08:24:27-04:00

Family Fun | Part 1


Why It’s Important To Have

There are so many stressors on every member of the family today, financial, relational, and work/ school related stress to name a few.  The home is suppose to be an environment that will shield us from those stresses.  It is our safe place and shelter from the world around us.  It is also the place to build those lasting childhood memories.  How sad for time to just fly by because of our busy lives and have regrets about the time spent with our children.  We can’t spend our time living only for the weekend or the vacation time. We need to incorporate fun into our day to day.  When children are young get into the habit of making family meals something that you do together.  Take that opportunity around the table to talk but also don’t miss out on the opportunity for laughing and just plain silliness.  It is amazing the stress relief of a really good laugh.  Taking opportunities to look for fun also sets the tone for the atmosphere of your family.  What will your children feel as they think about their childhood? Will it be fond memories of great family times or will it be memories of wishing for something different.

Make sure to not take yourself to seriously and just have fun with your family.



Family Fun | Part 12018-06-22T08:23:33-04:00

Raising Daughters | Part 5


The Gift of Time

One of the things that is imperative to raising daughters is time. While this is true for all kids, daughters really need the one on one time to communicate. Look for ways to give your daughter your focused attention in the busyness of life. This is especially important for dads. It is easy for a dad to give time to his sons because they probably share similar interests. Fathers and sons may spend time talking and bonding while playing catch, fishing or other similar activities. While a daughter may participate and enjoy these things, she may benefit from a father/mother daughter date night. Look for ways to give your daughter time to communicate. This is especially important as she gets older. During the teenage years you want to be the one she comes to talk, not just her peers. Make sure to put quality time for your kids on your calendar.


Listen to today’s podcast for more.

Raising Daughters | Part 52017-10-05T11:21:49-04:00

Raising Daughters | Part 4


The Role of Dads

The role of a father in a girl’s life is amazing. They have the huge privilege and responsibility of being a major influence on how their daughter views herself and who she will become. This is such an important topic it is another that has an entire week long series dedicated to it. Click here to view the series call Fathers and Daughters.


And as always listen to today’s podcast.

Raising Daughters | Part 42017-10-05T11:21:43-04:00

Raising Daughters | Part 3


The Power of Words

The power of our words with our children is almost incalculable. We can build them or devastate them with what and how we speak to them. This rings very true for raising a girl because of how they filter things. This is such an important topic that we have spent a week discussing it. Click here to see the series.

For more on this topic listen to today’s podcast.

Raising Daughters | Part 32017-10-05T11:21:37-04:00

Raising Daughters | Part 2



One of the big differences in raising girls and boys is the issue of modesty. Unfortunately today, women are still judged on appearance so there is a constant pressure to look and dress a certain way. This may be even more compounded for our daughters as they live in a world of more intense peer pressure and scrutiny. There have been so many articles written on modesty, especially of late. While we are setting up boundaries in our home for what is and isn’t acceptable, we need to remember that modesty is also a heart issue. Am I dressing for attention or to get social needs met, trying to fit in or make a statement? We need to help our daughters see not only what they are communicating by their dress but look deeper to the motive behind it. It may be as simple as everyone at school wears this. Either way we need to be helping our daughter process modesty not just enforcing rules on the subject. The goal should be to have a daughter who honors Christ in all things, one of which is how she dresses. We also as moms, need to remember that we are the representation of what a Christ follower looks like to our children. How are we role-modeling modesty?


For more on this topic listen to today’s podcast.

Raising Daughters | Part 22017-10-05T11:21:30-04:00

Raising Daughters | Part 1


The Difference From Raising Boys

There are many ways girls are different then boys. We spent a week discussing boys, so now lets look at what it means to raise a daughter. Each gender has different needs just like different personalities do. If boys are higher end in their physical needs, for example getting their energy out by running and playing, girls are high end relational. Even in their self play, they are wanting to do things that are relational such as playing with dolls. These are generalizations but for the most part their needs will ring true. As parents we always need to be cautious about how we say things to our children but especially girls because they filter everything through emotions. We can see this especially as our daughter grows and begins to hit the pre-teen and teen years. We will spend this week looking at how we grow our girls into women.


Listen to the podcast for more on this topic.

Raising Daughters | Part 12017-10-05T11:21:24-04:00